Sickening Monday

Tis mornin i came into offc & i was shocked to get tis email. The content o tt email gave me a lousy start 4 e day. Demise o Kevin's dad. My condolence. Sighz. I felt kinda down thou. Lunch time, we decided to pay a visit @ Kevin's plc & another colleague offered to drive us down to e wake. And it was e start o my grievances for e day.

I went down to e wake wit my Mafia gang (Mena, Nana & Winnie) & Taufik was e driver. It was my first time to see Taufik thou we had attended course together. Since e time i heard abt tis guy, e impression was tt Nana & him were fren since some sec or pri sch days & dey were neighbours too. Okay, tt was fine & cool if he wana send us down to e wake in the position o a colleague. Wen i got into e car, i felt goddamn uneasy. Reason bein, Nana's body language was goddamn wrong! She seated in front & slanted her body to face Taufik & acted like she's e co-owner o e car. Tt led me to tink if she has got smthin gg on btw e both o them. Dey acted like dey r alr a couple & e way dey tok to each other, wen their eyes meet, it gave pple e feel tt dey r reali tgt. In my mind i was tinkin - Aint Nana still wit her bf or mayb she broke off wit her bf for another guy?? Y is she so close wit tis fellow here ?? I m totally lost. Nvm, tt was e first issue. Secondly, e 3 o them had small toks in e car while i was bz on e phone. As proven by few o my ex-employers, i m someone who observes sharply & i jokingly asked if dey got smthin hidin fr me. Den Winnie offended me ONE BIG TIME !!! CCB !! It's REALI ONE BIG TIME !!! Dey spontateously answered NO. Fine. So i kinda probed further - 'Sure or not har?' Den Mena, bein e neutral one always, admitted tt dey met yday n went for Fish-Spa. I was like...no big deal ma... Den it's at tis pt o time Winnie uttered smthin tt pissed me off. She said tt cos dey went out & did not ask me along & therefore dey wana 'kip it a secret'. Oh Pls, if u ask me, i dun fancy gg out wit them. I got very annoyed & hollered - 'It's nt as if i m free for such thing !' Winnie turned & commented wit a very crude tone - 'We went fish spa n let e fish bite. We did not ask u along & we dun intend to tell u more.' WTF ??? Wad's her prob now ???

I kept quiet aft all these co-motions. I was listenin to my mp3 all e way till we arrived at Kevin's plc. Dere, we started another round o silent war. Nana was seated next to Taufik. I saw her placin her hand on Taufik's thigh. Tis action got me even puzzled !! I was like...WTH la !! Dey reali acted like dey r reali attached to each other !!! At tt instance, i was feelin very upset. Upset cos i tink tt i m facin another shitty person in my life agn. Thou i had nv treated her like any other fren o mine but i make it a pt to show care n concern as i tot i can still respect her as my colleague. And it's like seein another immature mly woman, foolin ard wit another man tt may lead to nowhere. Once agn, on our journey back, i kept quiet n listened to my mp3. I chose to leave them alone.

Got back to offc, i complaint to Ridzwan. As i ranted, i was tinkin mayb i m too bz-body but on e otherhand, i dun wish to see tragedy - meanin another dumb woman got cheated (agn). zzzzzzzzz. Someone kill me ok?? Aft all my complaints to Ridzwan, i received an email fr Nana.

Heyy babe...I hope you were not affected by what we have said to you earlier on in the car. We thought you might be busy on saturdays which was why we didnt ask you along coz I noe definitely that you'll have agendas goin on during the weekends. But next time, put some time aside for these 3 lil colleagues of yours for our next outing k? On the other hand, yes...I have broken up with my boyfriend months ago...it has been quite some time..I juz didnt want to tell you all yet. Mena and winnie only knew me and Taufik as close friends and indeed we are. I knew him during our childhood times...one of my neighbours. So yea, I hope it clears your mind...and always remember that we have never haf any ntentions of keeping behind your back k. We're weighing the options based on you too...

I was on e phone wen i read tis email. I was tokin to Uncle Lau, complainin to him abt all these shits. I told him tt i m NOT e one wit problem but these pple!!!! Wen i read tis, i almost tear. Tear cos i felt like an idiot cos i m so dumb to have wasted my energy to tok to them all these while. I wasted my time on them. WHY WHY WHY ?? I felt like a fckin stupid bitch who do nt wise up aft bein 'cheated' by fren ard me. zzzzzzz. I wanted to reply her tis - it was seemingly an attempt to hide cos on last friday, i can see it wit my eyes n sensed wit e body language.
it doesnt matter cos i can differentiate btw facts n acts. it's a thin line afterall.
offended? tt's kinda belittlin to tink i m offended. Since u pple had assumed tt i b bz .. den b it. It's seriously no big deal if u guys planned to meet up w/out me. So yea, no nid to act like it's a masterplan.
as for taufik, it's obviously tt u r into him. dun ask me y but ur actions speak louder than words. no nid to explain cos certain things, it would b better left unexplained. I appreciated tt u take time to clear (my) doubts & thanks for the offer o donuts from Taufik.

Ridzwan adviced me not to do so as it mite sour things btw us. Seriously, i dun understand y these pple can get into another r/s so fast wen i once heard tt e feelings btw e couple back den was so gud & it's like dey wana get engage soon. It's makin me feelin disgusted for sure. Dun ask me y. I m a traditional person wen it comes to such commitment. Okay, i know i m bein call a stupid bitch nw but who cares. Mayb i take it too hard? Or mayb i reali treated them as my fren?

I told myself tt i will ignore them for gud. Der's no pt o me to make myself feelin so miserable. And to add on one more thing - I M SURROUNDED BY ALOT O BITCHES & BASTARDS !!!! Woes to these fckers !!!

I tink i had too much grievances against too many issues. Yday, I was told by my fren tt someone out dere has got problem wit me cam-whorin away last week. It was a series o pic tt i took for myself while waitin to go out. Seriously, pple read another person's blog for entertainment & e blogger blog for e fun out o it. And if tis someone has got problem wit my face, tell me st8 in my face. WHY go ard tellin other pple tt i ACT CUTE ??? waahahahhahahahaha. Mayb I m too cute for some pple to handle & tt's y dey r commentin soooo much. Wen pple ask me 2 get a life, i tink dey nid it more than i do ! Reason bein, I dun do things under e table.

At times i wana b nice to everybody ard me but it always seems tt someone else jus wana spoil e market n make me a nasty bitch all over agn. Well, o cos, i dun change jus bcos someone caused me to but bcos i m always a devil. So yea, pple, rmb tt u dun wake up e animal in me else i BITE. I supposed Ridzwan kinda terrified o me now. hahahaha. Seein how i reacted today in offc. hahaha !