Blank mind

I tink I m rushin for time everyday for slp, wrk, class & e time to take a step back to see a clearer picture o things tt r happenin ard me.

Okay, I m nt compplainin bt I seriously wish for more than 24hrs a day thou someone had told once tt IF I would stop my MSN, bloggin n perhaps chattin on phone, I would definitely b able to accomplish more tasks as stipulated. hahahahaha. It still boils down to e fact if I m disciplined enuff.

Sadly, I M NOT.

I was readin my notes minutes ago & suddenly my brain went on hibernation mode. zzzzzzzz. 30more mins or so, I gona hit e sack. I aint gona wait for Mr. Lee's call. My Xiao-Pang is askin me to slp early. hahahahaha.

Rite, tml nite is gona b law class.

I gona go do some last readin & call it a day. I b on course for e next 2.5days durin offc hrs. AND I b havin evenin class aftwhich. Oh goodness.

Frankly, I duno y is it tt my blog is bein flagged !!! I guess whoever flagged mus b offended by me. However, I will still continue blogging. =)

FFRRRIIIDDAAYYYY !!!

hahahaha. My fave day o e week cos I knw tt my body is raisin my energy on its own !! hahahaha. I always feel energise rite aft wrk !!! BUT I b gg hme tdy. Tml gotta come bk for sat duties. kekekeke.

Tis weekends gona b bz, yet agn. Tml morn wil b burn cos o wrk. Den aft which I b headin back to sch to clear some o my assignment tt wil b due sooooooon. And aft tt I b stayin out to clear my hmewrks. zzzz.

Sunday, it's my darlin niece's bday celebration !!! kekekeke. My cutie princess is 1yr old !!!! hahahaha. Time reali flies. My lil boy is gona b celebratin his 3yrs old bday sooooon !!!! hahahaha. It means I m gettin older too !! hahahahaa.

Okay, weekends full o programmes. I guess I nid pre-bookin system to block away other activities. LOLz.

Last nite I got hme rather early bt I din slp early. LOLz. I was on e line wit my Mr. Lee & I guess I irritated him quite badly tt he called minutes ago to scold me. hahahaha. My dear Mr. Lee....who ask u to tell me abt tt woman ???? U r allowin me to piss u off. U r givin me chance to disturb u !!! ahahahaha.

AND !!!! I will continue to do so... Who ask u to make me so angry back den !!! hahahahaha.

Confusion & Uncertainty

At tis very pt o time, I m feelin real confused & is uncertain o myself. For the whole 25yrs o my life, I realised tt I had been leadin a life wit no aim.

Okay, tis is e aft-effect o havin too much changes for e past few mths till tdy. Dang.

I m seein too much changes tt I m feelin real tired to carry on my daily routine. I wana take a long break off my wrk. I dun feel like continuin my studies & e best o all, I WANA HIBERNATION !!! I feel tt I nid time to myself.

My schedule has been soooooooooo tite till I dun have rest @ all. I got alot o things to take care o - wrk, studies, family, frens & my personal problems. Thou u pple may say tt I SHLD PRIORITISE. It seems tt alot o things jus cnt help bt to come my way.

I aint complainin hw pple always look for me in times o nid bt it's gona b over my limit real soon - I m on e verge o breakdownin cos my energy r almost totally drained.

I feel tt dere's alot o stuffs for me to clear & dere's alot o things tt I gotta attend to it by myself. No, my trust towards pple is still dere bt somehow I choose nt to trouble others.

I hope tt I m still able to go on for the next 2.5yrs @ least. I dun wana stop for personal problem thou.

Mid week

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Tonite got class !!!!!!!! Dang !!!! I wana go hme n slp !!! Weather's so coolin for nw. Hw nice wld it b if I m lyin on my bed nw. hahahahahaha.

And I scratched my mp3 player !!! Dang !!! It's less than 3mths old & it's full o scratches !!! hur hur hur.. Destruction done & is countin ... zzzzzzzz..

Hope tt tdy's class wld b fine. I nid chix essence sooooooooonn. hahahaa.

Sry pple, it's so random o me nw. LOLz.

Okay, bk to wrk. Reports waitin for me thou. =P

Tirin days ahead

Alot o pple r askin me y do I look more haggard as days go by. zzzz. I m beginnin to feel insecure wit my looks. Dang. Helen called me tis morn, askin if I m okay or not as I m always appearin to have tis look o tiredness wit a pair o blood-shot eyes early in morn. Sighz. 2.5yrs to go. I m kipin my fingers cross if I m take tis kinda wrkload n studies stress. Mayb it's time to hit e track to destress !!! hahahahahaa.

Yday was indeed crazy. In e sun for abt 3hrs & my face got alil burnt due to e scorching effect. zzzzz. Fatigue hit me all over agn. I m supposed to b outta offc doin field wrk bt was bein excused for I'll b e only female. hahahahahaa. At times it's gud bein a woman. LOLz. Slightly more privileges than men. hahahahahahahaa. =P

Fall out fr e location, I rushed hme for a quick shower in e hope tt I wnt doze off in class. It can b rather torturous to go for class rite aft such field wrk. Dang.

Okay, I m feelin guilty towards LKC cos he came over to pick me up to go sch tgt, skippin his dinner wen I recalled last nite tt he got gastric attack once awhile ?? Oh gudness. No wonder he asked y din I treat him nicer than others. LOLz. Damn funny. Anw, we were abit late for class due to traffic jams. zzzzz. Traffic congestion can b so bad in SG durin peak hrs & I tink tt everyone is gettin richer to b able to afford a vehicle on their own. zzzzz.

I m feelin tired still. I gona slp early tonite. Class tml nite agn !!!

And LKC, I will try doubly hard to treat u better okay. LOLz. Pls do ur part as a fren for more than a decade too. =P

TGIF !!!! I'm Lovin' It !!

It's friday finally !!!! hahahahahahaaha .. And I m havin alil bit problem tryin to wake up on time for wrk nowadays. Sighz. But thank God tt I m still able to make it to offc on time. LOLz.

Last nite was crazy. My gastric attack almost got me lyin on e streets. My stomach got so uncomfy tt I gotta rush for a cab to get hme fast. Upon arrivin at my door step, I bcame a 'Merlion', yet, agn. Dang !!!!! I couldnt slp e whole nite as I m worryin abt my illness more than anythin else. Sighz.

Tis mornin in train, I saw one o my classmate. hahahaha. He recognised me & We spoke abit b4 he alighted to get to his wrkplc. hahahahaa. He made me realised tt Accountings may nt b so difficult aft all. =)

Okay. I gona find my 'mummy' aft wrk today. kekekeke. I miss tokin to her. And I b headin hme to rest early tonite. Tis weekends onwards will b studyin days for me !!! God Bless.

PS: Dear Mummy, He is NOT my darling okay ?? But I m hopin for it thou... hahahahahahaa.. Dun scold me pls... =P

I m prayin hard tt I will have a gud day @ wrk today. *tick tock*

Bye Peeps !!!!

Long Day Ahead

I m beginnin to feel e fatigue level escalating. I tink very soon I wont b able to take tis level o slpless nites & tirin wrk. zzzz. God Bless.

Tonite I have got class, agn. I m startin to wry e amt o wrk tt I can absorb into my brain to ensure tt I can pass all my modules well. Oh Boy. Tis is e first time in my life tt I m facin such a big big challenge. Dang !!! Someone save me pls !!!

Anyway, I jus wana express many thanks to Mr. LKC whom, been somehow, fetchin me ard wenever I nid a ride, b it aft class or b4 class or any other days wen we r out tgt. U r e best, okay ?? hahahahaha .. Rite, I sounded so fake & insincere!! hahahahahaha. Thank u very much for bein such a gud fren BUT pls stop tellin me tt U r treatin me e best among my other frens lah. zzzzz. Not as if I cant see it wit my own eyes. hahahahahaa.

And to you : Thank u for rememberin me every nw n den as I know tt ur call somehow do perk me up. You had nv failed to make me smile thou. =)

I miss you, Darlin. Wonder if you get to read my blog nw since you r nt back in SG?

Changes

Wrk was fine & I thank God tt I wasnt sufferin fr Monday blues. BUT I received news tt involved colleagues tt r close to me. Sighz .. I seems to hate changes at times.

I dun wana have new team mates at tis pt o time cos I tink tt my team shld b a grp o experienced officers jus like e way it is for nw for most o our officers. I duno bt e current newcomer seems abit hard to pick up e 'skills'. zzzz .. Dang !!

Last nite class was fine. I seems to b able to stay more awake than b4. I seems to b able to take shorter hours o slp. I m glad tt I m able to adapt to it !! hahahaha.

And rite b4 class, I saw one o my sec sch fren in e sch bookshop ! I called out to her & she asked if I m married wit a kid ?!?!?!?! I was stunned. I asked how e hell she got such a news & I came to realise tt it was e doings o my pri sch mate. Dang !!! The best part was tt, my sec sch fren assumed tt my classmate who were standin rite behind in e queue IS MY HUSBAND !!! Dang !!! I wasnt feelin awkward but somehow she's still as tactless as b4. zzzzzz..

Seriously, so wad if I m married wit a kid ?? Does it actually concern anyone out there ?? hahahaha .. Or mayb I m a hot topic tt pple jus wana tok abt ?? It seems tt everywhere I go, there will always b some 'gossips' ard !!! zzzz.

Tedious Weekends

Fri nite class was kinda tirin but thank god tt Uncle Chong drove me hme aft class ended. Got hme early & I got back to offc for Saturday duties e next mornin.

Dang !! Saturday duties can b rather tedious cos o shortage o manpower ?? I duno. It was scary yday. Alot o phone calls & alot o craps !!!!!! hur hur hur .. I almost freak out cos I m not well-versed wit those work, yet. I cant wait for attachment to e other unit !!!

Aft wrk, jus b4 I wana set off to find my 'mummy' @ chinatown, LKC called ! He said he comin to Novena & yea, I u-turn to acc him for alil while b4 he went back to collect his car. And my darlin came down to meet me too. hahahaha. How nice to see them tgt in a day.. =)

Went down to chinatown & stayed in Constance's shop till her hubby came to fetch her hme in e late evenin. Brought a new pants agn !! hahahahahaa .. I was on a mini shoppin spree yday. Hmmmm.. While in her shop watchin some online drama, my darlin pissed me off badly !! I shall nt elaborate on tt. I jus hope tt everythin aint tt bad as I tot or perhaps I had over-reacted yday. Dang !!

Tis mornin I couldnt bring myself to wake up. I nid slp dang badly !! I miss e smell on my bed tgt wit my piggy n galgal. hahahahhaa. Okay, I know tt sounded dang wrong !! It haf been comin 1 mth tt I m truly lackin o slp. zzzzzz.. I m still hangin on ....

Woke up by Auntie Ang @ lunch time & Bro got brunch back tgt wit Uncle Chong. How nice o him to get my Uncle Tobys for bite on e evenings tt I got class. hahaha. Brunch was great !! But I puked badly aft tt, AGN !! zzzzzz.

Met LKC to do abit o my revision. I tink I m lackin behind cos I realised tt I cant concentrate. My brain kept tellin me to slack & nt to do my wrk. Seein how LKC punched his laptop away, I was badly affected cos I know I was wastin time if I dun bother to do any wrk. Dang ! Someone kill me okay ??

Rite, I wana go revise abit o my wrk nw. Bye all. Wish me lucksssssssssssssss plsssssssssssssss ...

Angel vs Devil

vs

While the immature side o me try to take over my emotions, I realised tt I m gettin crazy & paranoid over some trivial issues ! I m beginning to b sceptical o any happenings & is gettin impatient wit things tt kinda dun go on rite. I nid to b in control thou.

And I realised tt pple ard me means alot to me wen I had always disregard pple's feelin & tots, unknowingly hurtin them in a way or two. Dang ! Okay, selfish act !

Some conversations wit my close buddies today made me realised tt I m always bounded by pple's actions. Meanin, if a person did smthin silly or smthin significant enuff for me to feel, I'll b badly affected !! While on e other side o me, I had always been blunt wit my words, makin others feelin pissed & perhaps hidin my emotions fr them.

I wish I could have been more open towards my feelings towards You. I wish I could be more tactical wit my words on You. I wish I could turn back time & do things tt I had nv do to You. I wish & I wish....

Crossroads

At times I wish I could believe ur words. I wish tt I could treat it as if things had nv happened b4. And wen I do hear fr u e last few days, I know tt things aint tt simple aft all. Mayb I m overly sensitive BUT I know dere's unfinished stuffs.

I m givin myself another mth. Wen things jus dun wrk out wen e time hit tis mth end, IT'S OVER!! I gona start afresh !! Anew wit a genuine start. Seriously, I had enuf o evrythin.

I will go crazy first b4 I can remain composed.

Strong Dose of Retail Therapy !!!

Okay, I nid my usual session o Retail Therapy badly !!!

For no reason I m feelin abit tight up with wrk & is gettin abit pissed with my reports n stuffs.

All o a sudden, I feel like resignin for tis wrkplc.

Rite, I m feelin abit outta track here.

Dang !!

Oh Boy, I had jus compiled a list o items to buy.
1) HTC Diamond2
2) Dresses
3) Tops
4) Skirts & Pants
5) Cardigans
6) New sets o Lingerie
7) a New Handbag
8) a New pair o flats
9) a pair of New glasses
10) a New Diamond Ring !!!

zzzzzzzzzzzzz... I tink I m not gettin any richer wrkin here .. =(

Slow Monday

I m takin things slow at wrk. I realised tt I cant b bothered to rush my wrk @ all. I m losin e kinda motivation tt I nid. I had nv felt tis way even if my supervisor pissed me off badly.

I tink tt I m havin more self-control than b4 BUT somehow situations dun allow me to practice it. I m seein things tt I shld NOT b seein. I m feelin things tt I shld NOT b feelin.

Gud or Bad ? Tis time rd, I tink it's BAD for sure.

Pple change but certain things jus dun change.

I change my thinkin as compared to a yr back. I changed my attitude over time. And dere's one thing tt I had nv change - my faith for my future.

I gona make sure tt I can pass thru tis 2.5yrs b it wad kinda problems tt I gona face. I nid to b answerable to myself. The rest shall come ltr.

Saturday Nite

I m tired & I m vomittin away like crazy.

Damn. I m losin my appetite.

Tis mornin went for Dim Sum with family & I did not take any food till I got hme in e evenin aft my class.

Okay, my stomach refused to digest tt bowl o rice.

Anyway, we had our first few classes for our first module. Quite tedious in a way. Got our first assignment & I m facin one big challenge nw. Dang !! Kipin my fingers cross if I m able to survive. God Bless.

I guess I b needin rest more than ever. I gona call it a day for nw thou it's Saturday !!!

When a stupid person meets another

Frankly, I hate to use STUPID on pple cos I feel tt it's an insult especially wen a wrong tone is being used.

Rite, I m gettin one stupid personality near me. Who is tis person ? hahahahhahaa .. Tis person WILL NV FIND OUT cos she tinks tt she's e greatest o all !! Someone who is so full o herself.

Someone who always wana plant her thoughts onto others, tryin to manipulate others. Someone who tink so greatly o herself tt she can tok & write well. Someone who is childish. SOMEONE WHO REFUSES TO GROW UP EVEN THOU SHE CONSTANTLY TELL OTHER PPLE TO GROW UP !!

No doubt tt I had always tell pple to wake up their idea, I do feel tt I nid to do it myself too. At times I got so immature till I make wrong decision.

It's saddenin to know tt tis woman is holdin on to alot o bondages. She will nv grow up & move on. She hated new changes & would only wana kip to her own personal space. She is not receptive to the fact tt everyone change & situations change too. She is always harpin on e fact tt someone else 'is hurtin her wit their actions' wen she dun even realised tt she's e one who started e nonsense.

Okay, enuff said. I m sick n tired o such character. I hope tt one day she get it fr someone else to learn her blardy lesson.